Surprising Near-End

[thax for the comments guys. they're all so sweet. Jane, huichean 4va luvs ya. Ben, thax for telling me that my words hav an affect on people. thax also for including my dedication in ur blog... ur sweet. Ness, thax for da email.. =P... thax for da advice. ur a real fren. lots and lots of love, hui.]

Friday finally came. Just like wat my rational mind predicted. However, my preminisions are usually wrong- the last post was no exception. I didn't cry once, once, at all during the last day of school with Jane. It was the last time I saw her wear Rossmoyne uniform... and I don't think I will ever have the chance to see that image again. Even though depression is somewhat shadowing me, it isn't pursuing my heart. I nearly cried on Friday morning when I saw TCP, but it didn't come out. I told myself to let my feelings out, but I guess even though I want to cry because of separation, my heart knows it's a happy separation- dat is not 4ver at all. This lightened my day, except I was half dazed throughout the day. On the other hand, everything's good, and I'm quite happy. It's gud to have happy endings- but... BUT, this aint no ending, just a near-end.

Jane will 4eva be with me; I'm not sure if my words have expressed my strong fondness for her enough, maybe they haven't, as exceptionally strong things cannot be expressed in words. I hope Jane will appreciate me like the way I do her, even if she doesn't, I know deep down inside how much I feel for her- that's all that matters. As long as I know the way I love my friends, whether they respond, it doesn't matter. This time- I'm definite about my feelings.

Luckily this is only a near-end, as the good friends I have lost in my 15 years of life is quite significant. I moved a lot in my life, never stayed at a place for more than... 3 years, until now. I have stayed in Aust for nearly 5 years, which is a HUGE record. I finally have established a strong base of frenz... even thoe I still have quite strong bases in m'sia... definitely not as strong compared to the one here thoe. Even though I've stopped moving, it's my frenz' turn to move. Already, including Jane, its 3 frenz. BEST FRIENDS. I had to use that term "best", just to express their closeness to me, coz all my friends are "best friends" to me. In M'sia, countless hav left... or maybe, I left them. I'm still grateful for the bonds I have though, coz even thoe I moved a lot... i still managed to keep making frenz and moving on. Survival skills huh?

Cherishing people is far more beautiful than cherishing objects. I think I'm lucky that I have people to cherish. love to u 4eva jane, u're 4eva in my heart. love 4eva to all others too, u guys are alwayz special, too.

^^b